Facing our demons

Overcoming our own demons is a constant battle. From feeling we are not worthy to feeling invisible, we all have our own fears. Feeling we are an odd duck in this world is not a foreign concept. This is how I felt growing up.  Like millions of people I felt I wasn’t in the right place. I had nothing to do with the life I was currently living in. It was a constant struggle not understanding why I felt the walls were closing in on me.

Having no guidance and teachers to show me the path, I had to survived by pushing into the unknown feeling a claustrophobic feeling in my chest. My spirit warrior was fighting for me. I let my imagination occupy most of my time, so I did not have to succumb to the pressures of my outer conditions.

Living a life of chaos, not knowing what love was, being faced by hardship is what I had to start with. My heart was protected by a shield I created to protect my core beliefs. I did not want to turn into a stone but instead I kept the love I had and the compassion I felt alive in my heart.

I have learned to do everything on my own not counting an any help from the outside world. I felt the coldness of the world when we got our house ripped out from us.   I felt my world turn upside down. Not knowing what tomorrow would bring or what would be on my plate. But I got it in me to pull myself out of that experience that wasn’t mine to start with.

I created for myself a world of love and compassion that would be my ultimate goal. Feeling I wasn’t alone anymore. I created my own circle of light. I never doubted my spirit, even if at times I couldn’t see what was up or down. I kept believing in me and the process.