I am pleased to published an essay from my friend Jessica Audrey Marie Houston.
She steps outside to light a smoke… the familiar sound of the nearby passing train soothes her soul.
Memories of sadness drift in and out of her mind.
She tries not to question, yet she has no choice.
She tries to surrender, but she can’t.
She wants to scream, but she has no voice.
She wants to explode, but she can’t ignite.
The cold wind rips through her soul, as its sharp sting reminds her of her goal.
That goal is her golden nugget… it’s a priceless gift, it’s a ticket to freedom.
That “nugget” is her driving force.
They say she is resilient; hence, she’s tries to agree. Yet, in times like this, she tends to differ.
She has two fights… one for herself and one for the other………….
The “other”…. is a person with love, passion, humor, humility, strength, creativity, uniqueness, and the intelligence to understand life in a way most people cannot; hence, she views it through the eyes of a thousand souls.
This “other” was a gift given to her through the grace of God.
The “other” was put in her life so she could survive the road she was forced to travel.
She knows all to well….
Despite the harsh reality that her heart is burdened, and her mind is exhausted, she recalls that she was given a gift from the Creator. Encompassing all that she must embrace…. she views the rough terrain of the path that lays before her.
Scared, and confused, doubting every thought, she steps forward onto the path. She will not surrender, she will fight harder, she will not falter, she will journey forward and onward, despite the potential setbacks she is leery of.
Who is she fooling?!!!!
She’s alone…it’s…. she, herself, and her!!!!
She begins to reflect…. was this her choice?
She continues to reflect…. sometimes life doesn’t have choices.
Regardless; of “choice” or not, the God gave her a heart and a “gift”.
The heart will guide her, and the “gift” will inspire her.
She finishes her smoke, and steps back inside.
Once inside, she returns to her reflection and thinks about the “nugget”.
She concludes that; goal aside, more importantly, she has a lot of heart, and the most beautiful “gift” in the entire world; hence, she’ll be okay.