I would like to start with a story in this essay.
I have known an individual for over 5 years, he appeared as a nice person, always ready to help everyone. Women are drawn to him because of his kind demeanor. For the past 2 1/2 years he was in a relationship with someone. During that time, he never told anyone, but made it a point to let everyone know he was single. When he started his relationship, his mate told him she didn’t wanted to get married, nor have children. Because they had been babysitting his nephew they started to change their minds. Last year they decided to have a child, to the delight of his family she gave birth earlier this year to a beautiful son. From there they decided to get married, by early June they went to the court house and got married. Life seemed going well for them or, so it seems to be.
Life at home wasn’t what everyone thought, after giving birth to a child most women will have postpartum depression. To make the story short, she asked him to move to a new town and change jobs. He was trying to do that but because she had not taken care of herself by dealing with her depression, things were starting to crumble, their relationship was falling apart. She went back to her parents for a week and pulled the same stunt the following week. To add to that he started training a woman to be his back up at work. That individual, whom we are going to call ” Rebecca” started texting him day and night. Instead of ignoring those texts he responded encouraging her to chase after him. This created a perfect storm between his failing relationship and “Rebecca”. Instead of focusing on how to fix his marriage, he decided to have an affair with Rebecca, who is also married.
Speaking with him unveiled his lies but also revealed he had not learn his life lesson. But instead he was repeating it. He revealed that he had an affair a few years ago with a married co-worker. It created such a mess that he had to be transferred to another store. If you do not learn your lesson the first time, the Universe will continue to repeat it. This time he was warned before he had the affair with Rebecca what consequences he would have to face if he fell into the same pattern. Instead of walking away he decided to go for it, this time he is going to lose everything he had built with his wife.
The questions I have is how committed are you to your marriage and your mate?
Do you respond from co-workers’ texts day and night? To avoid any kind of confusion or unwanted invitation from a co-worker, do not respond to their text outside of work. If you do, you are encouraging that person to form an emotional bond. That could be the first step to “trouble land”.
At the first sign of trouble with your mate, do you run for the hills or are you facing it? Being in a relationship has its ups and downs. If trouble surfaces do you run and hide until the storm passes, or do you face them head on and resolve them with your mate to grow closer?
Do you share your personal life with a co-worker that has been texting you day and night? If so, you are now exposing your vulnerable side for them to exploit for their own agenda.
If you are having personal issues keep them outside of work. Close friends or seeking counseling could help you.
Keep the communication channel open with your mate.
Would you destroy your relationship because you are having issues by straying?