What makes us who we are part 1

peopleWhat makes us who we are? From the time we are born to our last breath we have embarked on our journey, the one that makes us who we are.

As a young child we learn from our family and surroundings. This experience can be powerful as well as devastating. Those experiences are the primary ones that stay with us the rest of our life.

If your childhood has been a positive experience, as an adult you will continue to carry them in an inspirational way. Most likely repeating them in your own life.

If you have not experienced bliss, but hardships, as a young child, your adulthood will most likely repeat this pattern. This can be extremely devastating because you will pass on to everyone around you what you have learned as a child.

How do you break these patterns?
Most individuals do not realize as they are going through life, what they have been taught was wrong. In some cases, moving through adulthood some of them realize, they have been repeating their parent’s behavior.  Consciously they decide to break those patterns to creates a new reality for themselves. You can also seek help with therapy to heal.

Growing up in a family that didn’t know how to be loving we had to learn to survive. As we saw our parents constantly fighting and arguing, we were exposed to a world of chaos. Harmony and nurturing wasn’t part of our daily life. We had our share of physical punishment as well, today it would be reference as child abuse. Let’s be fair here, we did our shares of mischief, but the punishments were greater than the “crimes” we committed.

As a young six sensory I learned to escape the world I was living in by using my mind. I had a place of refuge I was able to find comfort and love in that parallel life. Coming back to this world I always felt alone I wanted to go home but where was my home?

As we moved into our teenage years we were faced with a harsh reality. We were angry, hurt as our family structure was disintegrating right in front of us. We were helpless, we had no direction on how to cope with all the drama we were going through.

To survive we pushed further. As I was trying to find myself in the middle of this never-ending turmoil, I was able to escape by getting a job at Club Med. This was a life saver for me.  My first village was Opie, a beautiful village in the South of France. It was peaceful, we had no TV, we worked long hours, but it was a new world for me. I had to learn to speak with strangers every day. I was very shy, and this was a great way for me to get passed that. I had to learn other skills as well. It was a great incubator for me.  I was finally on my own away from the drama. I reinvented myself.

In this new environment I could finally learn who I was. I had the privileged to work in different countries, it is in Italy where I finally started to get some guidance. Someone gave me Dry Murphy’s book, this was my “ah ha” moment. His books made me realized some of the things I had been doing came naturally to me. Using my mind to make things happen. I started to see the potential I had, realizing slowly the infinite possibilities. Everything was at my reach, if I only focused on it.

I started to realize I wasn’t my parents, I wasn’t their behaviors. I was different. I didn’t want their patterns, but I wanted to create my own experience, my happy ending.